Deeper than the Mariana.

Today is our anniversary. One year ago, we were just married. Beside ourselves with delight and passion, we enveloped eachother with a love so deep, so pure, that we'd never know anything less.




I didn't know what to expect today. Sean had asked me to stay home for the better part of the day, so I assumed he'd be having something sent here. The doorbell rang, and I was given the most beautiful bouquet of roses I've ever seen. How I am so lucky, I still don't know. My husband is in a war-zone, thousands of miles from me. He's so far away, yet still manages to create a world for me flooded with brilliant light and warm affections.





From here, there is very little I could do for him today. However, I did manage this.

Warren Ellis and Neil Gaiman are two of our favorite contemporary authors. I knew it was a longshot, but I explained the situation to both (via Twitter, obviously), and asked if they could spare a moment to send him well-wishes. Both authors were kind enough to do so, and I'm sure Sean and I both did happy dances. I can think of countless gifts I could have given him today, but seeing as he wanted nothing but my love.. I think I've done well.

I can't believe it's been a year already. It seems like just weeks ago we were in that room, nervous and elated at what was to come. I'll never forget how it felt to look into his eyes, recite my vows, and to say "I do". It's an affair that has burned itself into my memory. I wouldn't have it any other way.

Today, I celebrate alone. Next year, he will be here, and we will embrace the day as we could not today. Sean Clark Harriman, I love you. Happy Anniversary.

Song sung softly.

So much has happened, yet I'm found now in the same position I was in two months ago. In a nutshell:

- University of Phoenix is a business, a fool's college who will take whatever money they can get their filthy, unaccredited hands on. I withdrew three weeks in, and now owe them $900. This has been so stressful for me, we don't have this kind of money to toss around. Alas, there's nothing further I can do to fight it, so I'll be making payments very soon.

- I have, however, enrolled with Austin Community College. My financial aid will not only be paying my tuition fees, but I'll also be receiving an extra $1000 or so per semester. This money is mine, it will be going into my checking account. I'm beside myself with excitement knowing that I will be paid to go to school. I start classes in January, and will be majoring in Psychology. I've always had the desire to learn, and to attend college classes for something I'm interested in. Business is practical, but the joys of higher education will be robbed of me if I take business courses. Instead, I'll major in what I've always wanted to, and it will be fulfilling.

- I was fired from the coffee shop, Star Co., and am still absolutely livid about it. I'd done nothing wrong. I have been nothing less than a fine employee at that crapshoot establishment, I enjoyed my job and the customers loved me. Never late, only called out once. What more could they want from me? Sean reminded me that yes, this is Texas, and I am not run-of-the-mill. I should have expected it. I've been unemployed for just over a week now, and finding something new has not been easy.

- I've been learning how to drive Sean's Jetta. I've never driven stick before, and always grew frustrated when Sean would try to teach me. Now, a friend of mine (who has dedicated his life to teaching) is giving me lessons. I've made considerable progress so far. My self-appointed deadline is the end of November - I'd like to have my license and be completely comfortable driving Sean's car. The sooner, the better. With this, I can get a better job, too.

I suppose those are the major bullet points of my life right now. Things move so quickly, and suddenly come to a screeching halt. I don't know where the current will take me now, but I'm moving with it, and I will not be pulled under.

Sean has been gone for just over two months now. As a whole, the time has passed quickly. Some days, however, drag like an anchor on the ocean's floor. I get through each one with a sense of accomplishment, though. Tuesday marks our first anniversary. One year together. It hardly seems like it's been that long, at a glance, but so much has happened since that beautiful morning in St. Petersburg. I'm not sure what to expect on Tuesday. I may be bitter, callous.. but I'd prefer to be joyful, full of mirth and love and smiling, laughing in celebration. We'll see.

Time off.

I've been taking a hiatus from blogging. I'm not doing this because I have nothing to say, quite the contrary. There is an incredible amount of opportunity and change happening in my life right now. Nearly intimidating, the thought of finally getting it all down on paper, if one can consider this paper.

For the moment, however, I've turned to micro-blogging. It's been far easier of late to express myself in images. If interested, check out My Soup. At any rate, I should be back with an unbearably long update within a week or two.